Misunderstandings.

K: Why do I keep getting these sperm emails?
Me: Spam emails, dear, it's 'spam.'
K: No, I meant 'sperm'--they're all about increasing my sperm count.
Me: Oh. Heehee. Sorry.

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(In a shop)
Me (pointing behind counter to pharmacy-type goods): Do you have any dental floss back there?
(Clerk turns around and picks up band-aids, hands them to me)
Me: Uh, those are band-aids.
Clerk: Oh, you wanted floss, for your teeth.
Me: Yes.
Clerk: No, we don't have that.